Morrowisms

I often commemorate November 22, the anniversary of my Tonight Show appearance, with a blog post of memorabilia or updates.  This year’s post is not about me.  I need to relate one of the surprising twists of fate that has happened along the way.

(For those of you not familiar with the backstory , see my Tonight Show Silver Anniversary blog series).

The TV appearance brought me to the attention of a few people with similar talents.  In 2011, I was connected to a cool Canadian woman named Camilla Morrow.  In our phone conversation, she explained the word game that she played in her mind:

Start with a short sentence or phrase:  Why aren’t we together?

Eliminate the repeated letters, keeping only those that appear once:  whY AreNt we tOGether?   (“Why this step?” I asked.  She wasn’t sure why her mind insisted on this rule but thought it was perhaps to keep the result “manageable”.  She was also a natural alphabetizer, and she said that alphabetizing helped with this step in her mind.)

Form a meaningful anagram (reordering) of the remaining single letters.  Ideally, the result should complete, answer, or relate to the original phrase in a funny, ironic, or “wise” way:  Agony!

Got it?  Why aren’t we together?  –> Agony!  

Camilla gave me a few clever examples over the phone, and she said that she’d been keeping a list of them throughout her life.

When I wrote my silver anniversary blog post in 2014, I emailed Camilla to ask if I could quote some of her “Morrowisms”.  She wrote back with the bad news that her health was poor.  She added, “Before I’m off to the next world, I’d like to leave a list of my best ones…maybe I’ll ask a friend…..do you have any ideas how best to do it?”  I told her that of course she could just email them to me.  Even this was difficult for her at the time, but she did finally send me her list.  It must have been her life’s work, with over 600 examples!  “I hope you’ll be able to get them out there so people can enjoy them,” she wrote.  I responded to say thanks and to give her my reassurances, but didn’t hear from her again.

That was March 8, 2015.  I later found out through a Facebook post that Camilla died that very day!  She had literally entrusted her life’s work to me from her deathbed.  I felt honored with a responsibility to post Camilla’s Morrowisms online.  I’m not a famous person with a “platform”, but at least they will be out there as she intended.

Enjoy Camilla Morrow’s full collection of “Morrowisms” on this PDF or below.  Most of them are clever, funny, and light-hearted.  One of my favorites is “St. Paddy’s Day –> Pint.”  Many of them don’t mean much.  Part of the fun is sorting through the duds to identify your favorites.  And then there’s the penultimate one, the heartbreaking entry, “And nothing more –> Grim death.”

Rest in peace, Camilla!  Your crazy mind lives on!

 

1)                  In the end, it didn’t matter.   Harm

2)                  * Why aren’t we together?   Agony

3)                  At his right nipple, point.   So large

4)                  Thirty years ago.    His ego

5)                  See if a new flood comes.   Calm wind

6)                  And I don’t care, and I should.   Her lust

7)                  * Construction Area – Keep Out.    Skip

8)                  That’s my final offer.   Hymn or lies

9)                  All but guaranteed a gold.   Born

10)              * A little more liberal.   Mob

11)              You are a treasure.   Toys

12)              Surrender to God.    Sung

13)              Still satisfied.   Fade

14)              * He’s a forceful guy.    Gory clash

15)              * This romantic setting.   Ego charm

16)               * Armed struggle.   Mad lust

17)               * In tough economic times.   Hugs

18)              She got the press release out.   A plug

19)              Nobody bothers.   Shy trend

20)              Hey, sweetie!    Shy wit

21)              * Consume less – share more.   A lunch

22)              * Hippie ice cream.   Harm

23)              Someone might see me.   Night

24)              Your place is great.    Guilty cops

25)              * Are you meeting a guy?   I’m torn

26)              * The World Trade centre.   Can howl

27)              * What are my intentions?    Shy warm

28)              * Bless their hearts.    Bali

29)              * That won’t happen.    Woe

30)              * Is there something going on, though?   Rum

31)               Outdoor dogs are fine.    Fang suit

32)              * She seems really honest.   Not Mary

33)              *So he is happier there.    Tao

34)              The natural world.   How rude

35)              * Getting married.   Damn!

36)               * I suppose you want some money.   Wait

37)              * This was awhile ago.   Let go!

38)              * Emergency exit only.   Grim lot

39)              * Asking for a sign.    Fork

40)              * Ice cold Coca-Cola.   Die

41)              * And you’re on the road again.   Hit guy

42)              * So we’re still negotiating.    War

43)              * Age obsessed.   Go bad

44)              * I don’t know what he does.   I ask

45)              * A pre-nuptial agreement.    I glum

46)               Visit our auction site.   Cavern

47)               ** She was always trying to lose weight.   Run

48)               * You are a strange one.   Gutsy

49)              * The choice is ours.   Rut

50)              The place of inner perception.   Half

51)               I thought you hate the cold.   Icy glad

52)               About moving a mattress.   Give burn

53)              * What’s she to do?   Wade

54)               You are so beautiful.   By flirts

55)               * The interrogation.   Hag

56)               Skulking around.   Drag soil.   O sad girl

57)              * I was at an all time low.   Omens

58)              * It’s time to change things.   Coma

59)              ** I see rain differently too.   Sadly

60)              * Laughter.  Urge halt.  Hug later.

61)              * Renewal.    We learn

62)              This being human is a guest house.   Mob

63)              He’s healthy.   Salty

64)              * Who was in the middle?  Lost man

65)               * I am in an American empire.   Cop

66)              * Well, it won’t kill me.   Monk

67)               That’s how the light gets in.   No law

68)               Did you want a hand?   With you

69)              * Oh, that’s huge.   USA ego

70)              * What, you’re going already?   Wild hunt

71)              * What did they say?   Wise

72)              * Nothing is sure.   Hurt ego

73)              * How does she do it?   Wit

74)               *She taught hatred.   Drugs

75)               And we made him a song.   Go wish

76)               Well, I get determined sometimes.   Grown

77)              * Oh, dear lord.   Heal

78)               It’s got to be easier.   Grab, brag

79)               * It doesn’t really work.   Kind way

80)               That held him together.   Loud grim

81)              * Still, it hurt.   Rush

82)               Suspense.   Sees puns

83)              * Wow, we’re sweating.   At groins

84)               When we’re cleaning.   Rich gal

85)               It’s not a big grant.  Robs

86)              * One is in a prison.   Rape

87)              * He took off for the winter.   Wink

88)              * How was your weekend?   A shy drunk

89)              * Needing drama.   Grim

90)              * This isn’t happening.   Age

91)               Where they were too irritating.   Yang

92)               I didn’t mean to go for so long though.   Far mules, slum fear

93)              * That’s right; you’re really into that.   Gun

94)               Which was pretty cool.   Lies pray

95)              * Oh, I hope it doesn’t happen.   Sad

96)              * He won’t come to my place.   Why plan?

97)              *This is their destination.   Road

98)              * I love Iranians.   Lovers

99)              * She’d had a tough life.    Soul gift

100)           Guess who I ran into?   What urge

101)          * He was furious.   I fear how

102)           Now I need to hold babies.   Shawl

103)           Anything within reason.   Wry egos

104)           Keep the promise, China.   Mock rants

105)           And a little blurb about it.   Drone

106)          * Pull your weight.   Why ego trip?

107)           Well, it’s my reality.   Swarm, warms

108)           Eastern Europeans.    Pout

109)           It’s true, though.   Go rise

110)           The one who died.   Twin

111)           Did he know her as well?    No risk

112)           They’re tolerating it.   holy nag

113)           Please open slowly.   Yawn

114)          * They died instantly.  Lash

115)          * Where does it end?  Torn wish

116)          * It is only money.   Melts

117)          * This guy is my soul mate.   Go heal

118)           They get arthritis.   Gays

119)          * We want it a certain way.   Cry

120)          * Bohemian stubbornness.  I am hurt.

121)          * So there really wasn’t one.   Why?

122)          * Not a girlfriend.   Golf date

123)           It’s so difficult.  Cloud

124)           Only a few days.  Flow ends

125)          * The changing force of Canada.   Do it

126)          *She scares me.  March, Charm

127)           We weren’t sure.   Nuts

128)          * The long-awaited news.   His gold

129)           You are a strong man.   My guest

130)           Dread Canadian punctuality.   Reply

131)           So what’s happening?   Ego wit

132)           We can get you there.  A hungry cow

133)           And as we gather today.   Grown shy

134)          * It is used as testimony.   Damn you!

135)           Do you like his art?  Heard lusty

136)          * She tries really hard.   Tidy

137)          * No, please – I insist.   A plot

138)          * Beggar’s business.   A ruin

139)           So he sent her off alone, I think.   Lark

140)           And she told you this already.   Ruin

141)           Where shall we stay?   Try

142)           * Pretty strong stuff.   Puny ego

143)          *Writers on writing.   Egos

144)           How we going to celebrate though?   In a club

145)          * Great for her health.   Golf

146)           Yeah, like he really cares.   Sick

147)          * It is so not me.   Men

148)          * Magnificent migration.   Force

149)          * Don’t be so stubborn.   Rude

150)          * Oh god, he needs so little.   Gin

151)           I don’t like you anymore.    Drum talk

152)          * So that doesn’t work.   When dark

153)          * In this romantic setting.   Ego charm

154)          * Sitting alone in my room.   Sly rage

155)           We look a lot alike.   Wit

156)           Wear it as long as you can.   Guilty crew

157)           Ideal tourist.   Also rude, Dear soul, sour deal

158)           * Prodigal daughter.   I help out

159)          * Talk about obese.   Sulk

160)           He doesn’t have any visitors.   Dry

161)          * Yeah, it was intense.   Why?

162)           We aren’t what we think we are.   Ki

163)          * Is there any money in it?   harms

164)          * It cures what ails you.   Holy crew

165)          * Much criticism.   Hurts

166)          * Hi – can I come in?   A home

167)           Student housing.   Go hide

168)           Mediterranean sea salt.   Mild

169)           * I need to get out of myself though.   Sly mind

170)           It’s really interesting.    Gay

171)           * How do we end this?    Snit

172)          * Nothing stops her.   Gripe

173)           Well he’s a young man now.   Shy mug

174)           Are you willing to go there, though?   Yawn

175)          * Take me in your arms.   You stink

176)          *A hiatus hernia.   Unrest

177)           * It was what I wanted to do day and night.   Yes, go!

178)           * Bad teeth.   Hate debt

179)          * I will never leave you.    I warn

180)          * Important sounding.   Sad grump

181)          * That greedy little thing.   Randy

182)           Weird and intense.   Warts

183)          * I chose the path, that is.   Cop

184)          * What a great way to start the day.   Gods

185)          * I’m not going anywhere.   My wrath

186)           * Dad can’t stand arrogance.   Egos

187)           Have you got everything?   A ruin

188)          * Totally ridiculous.  A sad cry

189)           * Right on the money.   Grimy

190)          *And it cannot be touched by anything.   Bug

191)           That creates different challenges.    Dig

192)           Dad, he’s being humble.   A glum sin

193)          * So, what’s happening with it?   Ego

194)          * Thoughts subside.    I beg

195)            * I’ll keep asking.   Pangs

196)           Honestly, you are so weird.   A wild hunt

197)           For a moment, I forgot.   Gain

198)          *Hello, sweetie.   Show it

199)           *Oh he doesn’t want my pity.  Sad wimp

200)           *Gemini, the scariest sign.  Charm

201)          *To stop the bully.  Be pushy

202)           *They don’t sit together or anything.  Sad

203)          *What I will miss.  Math

204)           What matters most.  Whore

205)           To survive and flourish.  Left hand.

206)           I vividly remember as a boy.  Sold

207)          *In my heart it will remain.  Why?

208)           So here we all are.  Show

209)           The yellow star means death.  Word Hymn.

210)          *You want to count on her.  Why care?

211)          *There is an erotic charge.  Song

212)          *It would be so sweet.  Build

213)           Do people use it?  I’d lust.

214)           Wow, what a team.  Home

215)           I had a pretty good day.  Gripe

216)          *No, it’s got to go.  Sin

217)           No-one left to torture.  Flu

218)           In Northern Ireland.  Do halt

219)           I need some rest.  Mind rot

220)           How was your time away?  Rush time

221)          *No reason to be.  Brats

222)          **About being older.  Darn guilt

223)           You hear yourself.  Flash

224)          *Another guy.  Any hurt ego

225)           Show me right now.  Men’s grit, grim nest

226)           It would be too weird.  Blur

227)            I want to know what’s the matter.  Smirk

228)          **Oh god, I am so tired of you.  My fears

229)           **They are up to something.  A grumpy sin

230)          **He’s really smart.  Myth

231)          *The last thing on my mind.  Yes, a gold.

232)          *We will at least go into that area, though.  Ruins

233)          *Yeah, she’s a sweetheart.  Wry

234)          *What did you decide?  Watch

235)           No, this is the thing.   Ego

236)          *Engage all of your senses.  Fury

237)          **You are so ticklish.  Lucky heart

238)          *Is she all right?  Great

239)          *In front of all his friends.  Death

240)           **My warrior woman.  Yin

241)           A momentary thing.  Hairy ego

242)           To where the real power is.  A slip

243)          *So there you go.  Try hugs

244)          *If you guys are going in.  Safer

245)          *Ah, he’s a sweetie.  Wit

246)           There is nothing wrong with pain.  Spa

247)           What’s happening now?  Sit, ego

248)           He’s got church.   Ego rust, sore gut

249)          *We both turned the wrong way.  Bad guy

250)           He’s in India right now.  Water gods.

251)          *This is so great.  Go hear.  Oh rage!

252)          *We’ll have to see.  How vast

253)          *But I didn’t tire of it.  Fun bore

254)           We are people living happy lives.  Grown shy

255)           I wish I had a kind mother.  Know terms

256)           It does itself.  Fold

257)           We did the online thing.  Glow

258)          *And here we’re gathered together.  Now

259)           What’s left to fit in?  New halos

260)           So why are you telling me this?  Warm gun

261)          *It’s not for free.  Sin

262)          *It is so gorgeous.  True

263)          *He won’t be by.  Why not?

264)          **Untreated disease.  Ruin

265)          *Oh, I got distracted.  Go search

266)          *I’m seeing him tonight.  So?

267)           One last little warning.  Grows

268)          *He’s got things to do.  Dine

269)           One of the Iranian refugees.  Thugs

270)           I thought of it first.  Urges

271)          *I know we need to talk.  Dial

272)          *I try not to worry.  Win

273)           Of the four cardinal directions.  Lush

274)           The gang last night.  Lies

275)           Your little family.  Our fame

276)          *That’s my home in Canada.  Icy dose

277)           *She must be a really unhappy person.  Tomb

278)           I am single now.  Slow game

279)          *One of the clinchers.  Flirts

280)           Let’s go catch him.  A slim ego

281)          *Her sister is really ugly.  A thug

282)          We are in unity against you.  Grows

283)          *Well, we will soon.  Sin

284)           He can’t let go.  Clan hog

285)           My way or the highway.  Trim ego, git more

286)          *He’s my hubby.  Muse

287)           As he has said.  Die

288)          *Sadness around my family.  Our life

289)           When we’re ready.  Handy

290)           Oh, he’s really into yoga.  String

291)          Through meditation.  Damn urge

292)          **That was my generation.  Why so grim?

293)          When they were hungry.  Gut

294)           Raw food diet.  Fit ware

295)           For anything in your life.  Heal gut

296)          **Feels stressful.  Rut

297)          We’ll do some business.  Dumb win

298)          *Tell me the truth.  Rum

299)          *Then we were laughing so hard.  I do lust

300)           Too philosophical.  Cats

301)           Do I want it or not?  Draw

302)          **And she’s still doing it.  Oh, age

303)           I don’t need to be broke.  Irk

304)          *Oh, I adore him.  Dream

305)           Around that stupidity.  Shy porn

306)           What’s the prognosis?  Pain grew

307)          **That is my big terror.  Bash my ego

308)          *Catholic school was great.  I grew

309)          *The institute.  Shun

310)          *Make me look good.  Glad

311)          *Oh foolish heart.  Lust fire, sea flirt, farts lie

312)           *Let’s do my death right.  Glory aims

313)           We’re not related by blood.  Yawn

314)           Many arguments ensue.  Try

315)          **That’s all he’s got.  Ego

316)          *A ton of money.  My fate

317)           Are you not going to ask him?  He’s murky

318)          *Young and obese.  Bad guys

319)          *Die this horrible death.  A slob

320)          *The ultimate punishment.  Slap

321)          *Probably by bike.  Like a pro

322)          **The lifestyle.  Fishy

323)          **I don’t know what to say.  A shy kid

324)          Your body heals itself.  If hurt bad

325)          *Hippie ice cream.  Harm

326)          **Needing drama.  Grim

327)          **This isn’t happening.  Age

328)          *He was furious.  I fear how.

329)           Guess who I ran into.  What urge.

330)           *That’s true, go later.  Oh, slug.

331)          *And get the therapy you need.  Group

332)          *She’s a good girl.  Hard lie

333)           A shared house.  Dour

334)          *I am so frustrated.  I do fume

335)           The changing times.  Scam

336)           I can’t stand those kids.  Choke

337)          *And you’re in Asia already.  Soul

338)          *She got her way.  ‘Twas  gory

339)           How’s work going?  Shrink

340)           Off to Tatiana’s.  Sin

341)          *Accessible.  Bali

342)          *This is a Tibetan singing bowl.  Whole

343)           Wow – he’s in good shape.  Pain

344)           And it went where it went.  Hard

345)           Is that the usual?  Lie

346)           I do adore him.  Harem

347)          *That’s not that big a deal.  Blind egos

348)          *I need the stimulation.  Loud sham

349)           *May my spirit be reborn.  No past

350)          *When you come to a new country.  Harm

351)          *He read the writing on the wall.  God

352)          *That is the only thing.  Slay ego

353)           She had an accident.  Sit

354)           *It sure is!  True

355)           She’s going the opposite way.  Yawn

356)          *Well that’s a good sign.  He’d win

357)          *What women want.  Home

358)           *Why would I do this?  Lusty

359)          *Diets are hard.  Shit

360)           No, I don’t snore.  I’d rest

361)           Try it out for yourself.  Lies

362)           He really had it.  Dirty

363)          **You are no longer a refugee.  Fly

364)          *Singing in the rain.  Hearts

365)          *Probably the Himalayas.  Some trip

366)          *Like-minded people.  Monk

367)           A book signing.  Bask

368)          *Oh don’t do that to me.  Mean

369)           *Maybe he was bi.  My wish

370)          *What do we do?  Hate

371)           A son and daughter.  Hurt egos

372)          *You ain’t going nowhere.  Why a rut?  Hurt way

373)           My mind – I am so out of it.  Fun days

374)          *Is it getting worse?  Worn

375)          *Sudden old age.  Soul nag

376)          *So don’t keep asking.  Apt dig

377)          *This death diagnosis.  Gone

378)          *Comparing prices.  Man’s ego

379)           Yeah, he’s the only one.  Last

380)           People are scared.  Scold

381)          *I have been very busy.  In a rush

382)          I was at an all-time low.  Omens

383)          *So I have lived dangerously.  Hungry

384)           Fighting for dear life.  Hot land

385)          That is not happening.  Egos

386)          *That’s their present.  Pain

387)          *Dissatisfied.  Fate

388)          *That’s where it ended.  In wars

389)           He also had bladder cancer.  Sob

390)          *Stop the war. Raw hopes

391)           Kind of like you.  Fly nude

392)          *Adversarial.  Devils

393)          Was that the way?  Yes

394)          *What is there to gain?  Wrongs

395)          *Oh I hadn’t really noticed that.  Cry

396)          *Interesting thought.  Sour

397)          There’s no strength there.  Go

398)          *And then she died.  Sati

399)           Listen to your body.  Blind ruse. Rules bind.  Blind user

400)          *It’s all a rip-off.  Sport

401)          I’ll buy you dinner.  Bored

402)          Did you say anything to her?  Urges, surge

403)          And her food is good.  Fresh gain

404)          *I re-married.  Mad

405)          I hope you understand.  Pray this

406)           *Butter tarts.  Abuse

407)          That was really scary.  Chew

408)          Lots of ideas.  Die flat, daft lie, fit deal

409)          **What was wrong with you at thirty?  Guns

410)          Instant credit.  Sacred

411)          One more chance.  Harm

412)          *Who was that voice?  Vices

413)          *He has denied wrongdoing.  Wars

414)          Learning to let go.  Air

415)          *They’re royalty.  Halo

416)          *He was starting to talk like that.  Wrong

417)          *You are my mentor.  Aunt

418)          He’s so intelligent.  Hog

419)          *I trained in it.  Dare

420)          *That’s her spot.  Power

421)          She’s a mess. Ham

422)          Anything for a laugh.  Flirt

423)          He had a dog.  Ego

424)          *And then what?  Wed

425)          *Oh restless soul.  Hurt

426)          I started last year.  Idly

427)          I don’t want any bad blood.  Idly

428)          *Oh dear Lord.  Heal

429)          It’s pretty intense.  Pry

430)          **The horrors of war.  Waste

431)          *Otherwise, who am I?  Smart

432)          Certainly, contemporary commentary.  Lip

433)          There it goes again.  Horns

434)          *All that effort.  Hero

435)          A sense of belonging.  Bali

436)          *I owe you guys an apology.  Wise plan

437)          And then he’s depressed.  Trap

438)          *Stop the war within.  Persona.  No rapes.

439)          And I entered a new world.  Toil

440)          *To feel so desired.  Flirt

441)          Controlling the situation.  Age crush, cash urge

442)          This is not my place.  Echo my plan

443)          Oh, a real after-thought.  Gulf

444)          *Oh Dad, I think I made a mistake.  Son

445)          Nobody was even over thirty.  Bad wish

446)          That is so worth it.  Raw, War

447)          *Oh, I didn’t get into that.  Age

448)          *All this suffering.  Rage hunt, Heart Gun

449)          And it may be in a different form.  Boy

450)          It seemed to me I did.  So

451)          That’s not your style.  Run Heal

452)          *And how was the rest of your day?  Fun

453)          Be faithful and honest.  Soul bid, Soil bud

454)          I wasn’t being listened to.  Bad glow, blog wad, bold wag

455)          *That’s his thing.  Nag

456)          All the detail.  Hid

457)          It might be contagious.  Same bunch, numb chase

458)          That’s one way to take it.  Why sink?

459)          So many economic worlds.  Wild year.

460)          Ah thanks, sweetie.  Wink

461)          No resonance.  Scar

462)          To face my fears.  Most cry

463)          Oh well, that’s great.  Grows

464)          Where can you count on that? Wry

465)          She’s not a happy person.  Try

466)          The ultimate minimalist.  Shun

467)          This is what I get.  Wage

468)          Anything could happen.  Guilty code.

469)          Oh god, all their dogs.  I stare

470)          She doesn’t miss a thing.  Go mad

471)          I have to do this.  Saved

472)          That has not stopped.  End

473)          Trying to stay cool.  Girls can

474)          Surrender to god.  Stung

475)          Who do we think we are?  Kid rant, kind art

476)          Which was all totally okay.  Sick

477)          I sat down and wrote.  Rise

478)          Oh I adore him.  Dream

479)          This park makes me happy.  I try

480)          I don’t want to eat alone.  Wild

481)          You’re lonely.  Run

482)          The system offers me nothing.  Grimy

483)          Suspicious.  Cop

484)          Okay, but I’m a kid.  Dumb toy

485)          An old-fashioned man.  Himself, I’m flesh

486)          No more drama.  End

487)          That was so thrilling.  Wrong

488)          There is only one Italy.  Rash

489)          A son and daughter.  Hurt egos

490)          You were on my list to email.. Warn us

491)          He wasn’t cool enough.  Cult swag

492)          So why am I writing you?  Hamstrung

493)          So it was a trade-off.  Weird

494)          He dropped to the ground.  Gun

495)          The nature of poets.  Sharp fun, Harp’s fun

496)          What is wealth?  Lies

497)          That’s it, I want to settle in.  Howl

498)          Anything could happen.  Guilty code

499)          All I really want.  Try wine

500)          Inappropriate.  Tone

501)          And so honest. Death

502)          So honest.  Then

503)          Steal that guy.  He’s ugly

504)          What did you decide?  You watch

505)          All the little things.  Nags, snag

506)          *To get strong again.  Rise

507)          I am drinking you in.  A murky god.

508)          They’re young guys.  Thorns

509)          After that week of heat.  Work

510)          What about the writing?  Burn ego

511)          And how does it end?  Aw shit, what is

512)          I wonder if we can do it.  Craft

513)          Charging him interest.  Scam

514)          Let’s get together for a drink.  Kind flash

515)          I’m going through something.  Sure, ruse

516)          I am going to feel something.  Flash

517)          I hear you honey.  A ruin

518)          ? Very sweet and lovely.  adnorstw

519)          ? The highlight of my summer.  Sour fly, soul fry

520)          I need to know what he has to do.  Ski

521)          Oh what happened to this?  Winds

522)          What’s happening legs?  Wilt

523)           First thought.  Sour fig

524)           She ignored that.  Road sign.

525)           Hey military guy.  Glum heart

526)            He was fighting in front of the lawyer.  Sly

527)            Do I want to survive?  Sure wand, dawn ruse

528)            Lots of seals. Fate

529)            Which is a nice security.  Wry aunt, yawn rut

530)            *That’s a good thing to do.  Sin

531)            She has said that.  Die

532)            Contemplation time.  Clap

533)            That is to be really ethical.  Sob, cry

534)            I am freed from dashing around.  Gush, hugs

535)            But study it seriously.  Be lord

536)            It’s what she likes.  Walk

537)           And then he died alone.  Toil

538)            A rich bitch.  Brat

539)            What is your book about?  Why risk?

540)            This made me think of you.  Sad funk

541)           And what was I doing?  Ghost

542)           Ready to eat food.  Fry

543)            The most important thing.  Grapes

544)            They’re really unpleasant.  Push

545)           I still have enough leg strength.  Savour

546)           What’s the reasoning?  Grow

547)           I think it’s not likely.  Oh yes

548)           What’s going on in there?  Wars

549)            Toronto Fire Station.  Safe

550)            That is the only thing.  Slay ego

551)           That’s not what I heard. Doers win.

552)           I ain’t young anymore.  Get rum

553)            Oh it was awful.  Foul shit.

554)            And I’ll deal with it.  When?

555)            It’s a strong one.  I rage

556)            You’re not concerned.  Duty

557)            * I’m an old woman.  Wild

558)            When they are worst.  Say no

559)            ? Only boring people get bored.  Dirty

560)            ? They’re hard-nosed.  O nasty

561)            ? Singing in her own language.  Low rush

562)            Is her health still good?  Drag

563)            Did it hurt him?  Rum

564)           ** I need to transform myself.  Daily

565)           * You’re a bad boy.  Rude

566)            Why doesn’t she do that?  Yawn

567)            Oh that hurt me so much.  Scare

568)            Then he had another relapse.  Plods

569)            Why did I get weak legs?  Shy talk

570)           * Mostly I want to heal.   Wise hymn

571)            Don’t think that it’s doing nothing.  Ask

572)           * I ain’t going nowhere.  Wrath

573)            That twisted me.  Mad wish

574)           * A nation divided.  Vote

575)           ** My money is going fast.  Fate

576)           **I decided to bite the bullet.  Ouch

577)            He seems so happy with people.  May wilt

578)            That has not stopped.  End

579)            For a limited period of time.  Pal

580)            Both signs of being healthy again.  Fly

581)            One million dollars.  Dreams

582)           Oh no, his health is terrible. Ban

583)           Oh, I hadn’t really noticed that.  Cry

584)           *Oh god, I hope I don’t lose it all. Pang

585)           What happened to her?  Drown

586)            What went wrong?  Oh rage, go hear

587)           What has gone wrong?  Rest

588)           *I am not going there.  Harm

589)            Do i want it to not work?  dark

590)           Grandma’s natural remedies.  Guilt

591)           I’m afraid of my family.  Lord

592)            That was the sweetest gift.  Fig

593)            What’s there?  Wars

594)            And what’s the mom like?  Slow, kind

595)            It’s not a panic.  Cops

596)           I had coffee today,  Itchy

597)           You’re in the hot seat.  Say ruin

598)           *Letting out emotion.  Glum

599)           No, I had an accident here.  Rot

600)            My legs are killing me.  Snarky

601)           That people are at war.  Howl

602)           I do the same thing.  Mad song

603)           *Oh god, don’t do that to me.  Game

604)           How are we to understand you? Shy

605)           *Saint Paddy’s Day.  Pint

606)           *Like a lot of fathers. Shirk

607)           I knew it was wrong. Stark ego

608)           *You use people. Sly

609)           Oh, don’t do this to me.  Mines

610)           Strength and surrender.  A hug

611)           *What should I do?  Lawsuit

612)           *Well, I knew you were a long shot.  A risky thug

613)            * The planet needs help.  Sad

614)           Who’s going to want winter?  Rash

615)           You’re lonely. Run

616)           What is the other choice?  Wars

617)           And nothing more.  Grim death

618)           Maybe it’s really subtle.  Rumi

619)

620)

621)

622)

623)

624)

625)

626)

627)

628)

629)

630)

631)

632)

633)

634)

635)

 

 

 

636)

 

 

 

 

Announcing the GGGT of Scandinavia

I did not take a Great Grand Genealogy Tour (GGGT) last year because we’ve been saving up and planning for this year’s — the GGGT of Scandinavia!  We are taking this particular tour now in honor of my grandfather, Warren.  He is my oldest grandparent, and this is the only place where his ancestors lie outside of America.  Grandpa is generously sponsoring a good portion of our travel expenses in exchange for enjoying this adventure vicariously through us!

Warren’s grandparents were all born in Scandinavia:  His father’s father, Ole Hanson Fagerland, was born in Rogaland County in southern Norway.  His father’s mother, Mary Johannsdotter-Fagerland, was born in Kronoberg County, Sweden.  His mother’s father, Anders Andersen, was born in Nordland County in northern Norway.  His mother’s mother was born in Oppland County in central Norway.  We will be making an ambitious two-week loop through all four counties.  Time only permits us one day each in Nordland, Oppland, and Kronoberg Counties.  We will have three or four days to spend in Rogaland County.  The rest of our trip will be spent in transit, cruising up the coast, and resting in Oslo and Copenhagen.

I have marked several genealogical points of interest in the map.  Green pins mark homes, and red pins are churches and cemeteries.  (There are also a few purple pins for logistical points of travel).  Feel free to zoom in and browse these points.  If you are familiar with any of these areas, please contact me with information or recommendations!

Updates will follow.  I plan to make a photobook of the trip as I did for the GGGT’s of 2014 and 2015.

 

Old Place Names Quiz

The world as Europeans knew it in 1670

When I was growing up, it was not too hard to find books lying around full of stories predating the world wars.  I read plenty of Sherlock Holmes, Jules Verne, and 19th century ghost stories.  It intrigued me when they related to places so exotic that I couldn’t even find them on a map.  It’s a challenge to connect old place names to new ones, to understand exactly where they were.  It’s even more interesting to know when and why they changed.  See how you do on this quiz.

Bohemia

Byzantium / Constantinople

Dalmatia

The Forbidden City

Leningrad

New Amsterdam

The Ottoman Empire

Persia

Prussia

Sheba

Siam

Tenochtitlan

Atlantis

Click here for answers

Originally posted on The Evolution Of Human

GGGT 2015: Korb discoveries

This is the fourth and final post summarizing the discoveries of my 2015 Great Grand Genealogy Tour.  Today’s entry is dedicated to the Korbs (my maternal grandmother’s branch).

Grandma’s sister Marjorie, also known as Sister Maris Stella, has spent her life in service to the Catholic church.  I always felt a special connection to Sister, my mother’s godmother.  She was one of the first adults that I related to; she wrote letters to me when I was barely old enough to read them.  On this trip, I spent one night at Sister’s convent in Fargo.  I was curious to learn more about her career.  She has no children to carry on her memory, and her own memory is fading now, so I felt that this was the right time to ask for her recollections.  I was excited that she had plenty to say, not only about her career but her parents too.  Sister spent decades working with the poor, the addicted, mentally ill, and afflicted.  Then she wrapped up her career on a “social justice” committee, where she wrote newspaper articles, talked to leaders, and even spent a day at a UN forum.  Someday I’ll write more about this intriguing conversation, but while she’s still alive, you can ask her directly!

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Sister Maris Stella with Great Grandpa Korb (and probably Great Grandma’s finger in the upper right). Right before …

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… he tickled her.

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Sister with Great Grandma, 1963. She says this is one of the few times she was ever actually in habit.

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Sister Maris Stella serving the poor

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Good-bye hug. July 12, 2015.

The final point of interest was Turner County, SD.  This was where Grandma’s grandparents (my 2GGPs) met.  He was Bernard Janowski and she was Christine Schowalter.  3GGPs Schowalter, German immigrants, were homesteaders with a fairly large farm near Hurley, SD.  This was just 100 miles away from De Smet, where Laura Ingalls Wilder grew up in her “Little House on the Prairie.”

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3GGPs Schowalters’ land. For all we know, the barn and playhouse may have been theirs.

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3rd Great Grandparents Schowalter are buried near their homestead in Turner County, SD.

3GGPs Janowski immigrated from Poland in 1892 and spent their first few years in Marion, SD.  They did not own land there but lived with a sponsor family.  It was in this area that Bernard and Christine met and married.

_south-dakota-065_edThe Schowalters had been Mennonites for centuries.  The Mennonite line in our family came to an end when Christine married Bernard, a Catholic.  The Janowskis left SD shortly afterward to homestead their own land in Calio, ND.  Of course, many lines of the family are still there.  2GGF Janowski was known to visit SD occasionally for the rest of his life, though I don’t know what was still drawing him there.

 

 

We need to stop terror, not just terrorism

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One of LA’s most intriguing corners symbolizes the nation’s fears and divisions over the War on Terror

This September 11, I feel compelled to write a few words about the War on Terror.  It is an important issue this year as Americans make big choices.  We all know that emotional thinking can cloud judgment – and the War on Terror is one of the most emotional issues of our time.  When you look at it objectively, though, you reach a striking conclusion.  Yes, terrorists are definitely evil.  But in the grand scheme of things, they are not very deadly to Americans.  When you compare the cost of this war to its benefits, it is very hard to justify on its present terms.

American conservatives describe the War on Terror as a “Clash of Cultures”.  This characterization is an ideological belief, not a fact, and it is not productive.  A look at worldwide terrorism deaths reminds us what the fight is really about:  instability within the Moslem world.  Of the roughly 20,000 terrorist deaths worldwide in 2013, a majority of them were in Iraq or Afghanistan.  90% of them occurred in 10 African / Asian countries that are home to terrorist groups.   1 These groups are militias aimed at local governments or other sects.  Most of these groups don’t target outsiders.  ISIS and al Qaeda are the main exceptions.  The US and other countries engage them directly in combat, and they strike back at our civilians.

From 2001 – 2013, the number of Americans killed by terrorist attacks was about 3,000.  Outside of 9/11/01 itself, that number is about 400, and of those only 50 were on US soil. 2 That was a whole decade’s worth of casualties.

By contrast, on a typical day, 90 Americans are killed by guns at home or in the streets – by angry acquaintances, accidents, or suicide. 3  Another 90 Americans are killed in car accidents.  4  The overwhelming majority of preventable deaths in the US – 2,000 per day – are caused by our own stupid decisions to smoke, drink, overeat, and abuse drugs. 5

Terrorism is not even close to our biggest problem.

Nevertheless, more than half of Americans are “very concerned about Islamic extremism.” 6  That’s a higher rate than in Pakistan!  This disconnect is not surprising.  People don’t think with statistics.  We think with emotions.  Lifestyle-related deaths are not as evil or terrifying as terrorist attacks.

The emotionally-driven political response has been vastly out of proportion.  This war has cost trillions of dollars 7 , killed perhaps a million people 8 (wow), and sacrificed 7,000 US soldiers in combat 9 to avenge our 3,000 dead.  Not only that, but ironically most of those 400 American civilian deaths since 2001 have resulted from counterattacks against our War on Terror.

This conflict means less to the US, but more to the world, than most Americans realize.  The US needs to downscale its response, make it more efficient, and share it more evenly with its allies.  Our trillions could be much better spent on intelligence, police, and security.  Better yet, the responsibility and the budget should be spread among many nations.  The global solution to the problem is a very interesting discussion, and beyond the scope of today’s post.

As for the upcoming election, the two presidential candidates, for all their mudslinging and difference in style, have roughly similar platforms on the War on Terror.  Some of the key differences include:

  • Trump has expressed his desire to remove the US from NATO.  This would be counter-productive, as the solution needs to be international.  Trying to shore up the entire Moslem world would stretch America far too thin.  Then again, he has also spoken in favor of coalition support.
  • HIllary Clinton wants to work with Moslem Americans as a “coalition at home”.  10
  • Clinton supports stricter gun control for people on FBI watch lists.
  • Trump wants the US military to grow even larger.  Clinton supports a sustainable military with enhanced cyber capabilities.
  • Trump opposes arming Syrian rebels, and I have to say I agree with him on this one.    Secretary Clinton supported arming them, but Obama tried that and it backfired.  She does not include arming rebels in her presidential platform.

The more serious difference between the candidates and their supporters is their outlook on the conflict.  Trump buys into the “Clash of Cultures” storyline.  He and his voters see ISIS as first and foremost out to get America.  That outlook doesn’t get us any closer to the real problems in West Asia and their solutions.  Trump is riding on the coat tails of American fear, perceiving the terrorist danger as so large that it threatens the entire nation.

FDR said, “The only thing we have to fear is fear itself.”  Yoda was just as wise when he said, “Fear is the path to the dark side.  Fear leads to anger, anger leads to hate, hate leads to suffering.”  For Americans right now, it is just as important to conquer our terror as to conquer the terrorists.

GGGT 2015: Beck discoveries

It’s been a year now since my last Great Grand Genealogy Tour (GGGT).  Man, I think it’s about time to finish posting my findings!  This tour took me through the heart of Beck country.

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Lunch … or dinner … or supper or something. 7/10/15. Pat, Grandma, Grandpa, me, at G&G’s house, Munich, ND.

The name “Beck” (originally Böck) comes down through my maternal grandfather, Rallan Beck (born 1931, ND).  Grandpa’s ancestors have been in ND and MN since the 19th century, with surnames Beck, Helten, Nosbusch, and Mueller.

My goals for the trip were to rediscover historic Beck sites, to visit as many farms, churches, and graves as possible, and to learn more about Grandpa’s own younger days and recollections.  Like most family history, a lot of basic knowledge had been lost to our collective memory.  Even Grandpa and his sister Pat did not know much beyond their grandparents.

The most significant discoveries of this trip were the graves of 3GGPs Nicholas and Annie Helten.  (GGM Beck’s paternal grandparents).  It was amusing and bemusing to discover that Nicholas has been buried under our noses all this time, but we forgot about him!  He is located right next to the flagpole in St. Boniface Cemetery.

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Grandpa has three great-grandparents in the St. Boniface Cemetery. They had already been lost to family memory by his time, and were only “rediscovered” this decade.

It turns out that Annie is still in Minnesota.  3GGPs Helten had spent most of their life together in Stearns County, MN.  They must have moved in with one of their children in Benton County, MN, because Annie was buried there when she died in 1903.

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Cousin Kassie Zimmer did some library research in MN to help me rediscover 3GGM Helten’s grave.

After that, Nicholas moved to ND to live with one of his daughters.  Great Grandma Beck remembered him.

My 2GGPs August and Margarethe Beck met in St. Leo, MN.  Margarethe had grown up as a Nosbusch, just a mile north of town.  August was a newly arrived immigrant, a young single who bought land a mile south of town.  I visited both the Beck and Nosbusch farms, as well as the St. Leo Cemetery where 2GGPs Beck and 3GGPs Nosbusch are buried.

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The August Beck farm near St. Leo, MN. Great Grandpa John Beck grew up here before bringing the Beck name to ND. The house is gone now … for who knows how long.

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2nd-great grandparents August and Margaret (Nosbusch) Beck, St. Leo, MN.

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3GGPs Nosbusch (Great Grandpa Beck’s maternal grandparents), St. Leo, MN. I had to walk the whole cemetery twice to confirm that this was the right grave, because it doesn’t bear their first names!

I had a photo of the house that 3GGF Nosbusch built.  The house that I saw on the lot looked similar but different, so that was confusing.  Of course, a lot can change in a century.  I know that I was on the right property, because an old map identified a schoolhouse on the Nosbusch land.  When I was there, I met a boy who lives there now.  I asked him if there used to be a schoolhouse there, and he knew exactly where it had been, where some siloes stand now.  So this was definitely the right land.  I’ll post both pictures here and let you decide.

3GGP_Nosbusch_house

The known Nosbusch house. From Mary Nosbush’s family history book “Rooted, Uprooted, Rerooted” : “Michael Nosbusch built the left half of this house on his homestead in 1884 …. At present [1982] Alphonse Nosbush lives there.”

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The house that stands on the Nosbusch farm now. So similar but different — look closely at chimneys, windows, etc. Do you think it’s the same house?

I have put together a book about this whole trip, which explored Fagerland, Meyer, and Korb history as well.  The book details my research (how I made my discoveries) and then presents a daily travelog of this two-week adventure.  You can purchase a copy here if interested.  There are two price options, hardcopy or PDF / eBook.

book_cover

 

 

 

Bad English Habits of the Educated

© Pachai Leknettip | Dreamstime.com - Grade D Plus on NotebookIs English changing, or are people mangling it?  Am I just misinformed or worse – getting old and uptight?  I have noticed a few usages becoming extremely common, which strike me as odd or even rub me the wrong way.  I’m not talking about street slang, either.  I hear these every day among journalists and educated professionals on TV and radio.  Pardon my rant.  What do you think?

The “t” in “often” is silent.  When I was growing up, my teachers adamantly drilled this into our heads.  The word is pronounced “offen,” and there is no such word as “oftentimes!”  Now I routinely hear “off-ten”, “offen-times”, and even the doubly squirmy “off-ten-times.”

To read a quotation out loud, we say, “quote” at the beginning and “end quote” at the end.  “Quote: Ask not what your country can do for you.  Ask what you can do for your country.  End quote.”  Please stop it with the “unquote”, especially at the beginning of the quote!  “Quote unquote that doesn’t make any sense!”

The “H” at the beginning of a “Hu” word is NOT silent!  It annoys me to no end to hear academics talk about umans and their uge civilizations.  When the ell did this become the trendy accent of the year?

The word “forward” has two “r’s” in it!  When did the word become “foe-ward” ?!  :\

It doesn’t make sense to begin an answer with “so”!  “So” is a conjunction.  You state a premise, you say “so”, and then you explain how the premise leads to a conclusion.  Over and over in interviews now, we hear,

Q:  “How does this policy affect blah blah blah … ?.”

A:  “So, there will be a big change in blah blah blah …”

It’s as odd as beginning an answer with “Therefore.”  You have to tell me something before you’ve earned your “so”!

Does anyone remember the lost technique of projecting your voice?  It is understandable to taper off at the end of a sentence.  Now I hear people dropping their voice in the middle of a sentence, and then continuing to rasp airily away for the rest of the whole paragraph.  I’ve heard entire interviews with people that sound like frogs!  The idea of projecting your voice seems not to have reached British schools of broadcast at all.  British speakers have a habit of letting their voice fall to a whisper while on the radio, as if they’re trying to keep a secret from someone across the room.  Speak up!  The worst is when a broadcaster’s voice is so subdued that you can hear her spitty mouth and smacky lips.  >Q

My grammar teachers told us to avoid clichés.  At least some clichés make sense.  “At the end of the day” does not.  I hear it morning, noon, and night, and I still don’t understand what is supposed to be so relevant about the “end” of this proverbial day.

“Ginormous.”  Ha ha, yeah, I get it.  😐  Whoever coined this word, it was clever the first time.  Copying it from someone who copied it from someone who copied that person – sorry, it doesn’t make you clever or funny.

People always refer metaphorically to the “least common denominator” among a broad swath of society, when the mathematical concept they have in mind is the “greatest common factor”.  Remember – a least common denominator is a multiple, a big number.  The least common denominator of a diverse group of people would encompass their full diversity.  The base instincts that are shared by everyone form the greatest common factor.

“Leverage” is a noun, not a verb!  The word “leverage” literally means a multiplication of force gained by using a machine.  It is akin to the word “strength.”  Nobody would ever say, “I am going to strength my advantages to maximize my profits.”

The funny thing is that, while contemplating this blog post, I came across articles from an older perspective.  Apparently, senior citizens wince when youngsters use the word “fun” as an adjective.  “Fun is a noun!” they say righteously.  “You can have fun.  You don’t play a ‘fun game’!”  This opened my eyes, because I had honestly never heard that.  To me, “fun” has always been an adjective.  I guess that it’s a 20th century usage that shifted shortly before my time.  It seems perfectly okay to me.

I am forced to admit, then, that the objective is subjective.

At the end of the day, maybe I should have a better sense of umor, embrace the lowest common denominator, and accept the fact that language moves foeward.